"Nine years ago I sat on a bench in a parking lot, in the pouring rain, as night fell. I had just spent more of the inherited money I got when my grandma died on another little plastic zip bag of weed" .
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"I was smoking so much & often back then (also taking morphine, sleepingpills, drinking, you name it) that I often forgot my words; actually I often forgot how the sentence was going to end because suddenly I forgot how I had started the sentence or what I was trying to say in the first place . .
Anyway, I do remember being in a dream state. Dreaming about another life: a life where I was sober, happy, free from addiction, free of trying to numb my constant anxiety & inner hell. It felt so freaking far away at that time
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I visualized standing in front of people, sharing my message about how it's possible to change. Then I looked at myself with disgust..Who the hell was I, thinking I could help anyone? . .
That dream never died & for that I'm so grateful. I spent several more years being lost, but still had this small voice in my heart saying that my life didn't have to be this way, It could get better
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Then came Yoga & meditation. Without which, I may never have healed. . And It was when I dared to turn inside, look deep within, I started the path of growth. By accepting & forgiving myself, by finding a deeper meaning, a deeper connection to life itself & my soul. I am forever grateful for this ancient wisdom, yoga, that today is so accessible for all of us, if we dare to turn inside and look
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Today, 9 years after I sat on that bench, I'm over the top grateful for the radical transformation in me . .
The day I wrote this I went to work on my business & my passion; I held a seminar about changing mindset; I taught 3 yoga & meditation classes. Today I felt good. Today I lived a life that was just a dream in a girls mind 9 years ago .
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My past has been the fuel, yoga the fire to create that life & to inspire others. Your past doesn’t have to equal your future, dare to turn in - and allow your inner wisdom to come forth ❤
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