"Before Yoga I was a knot of energy. Self hate entwined with perfectionism, 3 years into my Yoga journey I’ve gained self acceptance, honouring my body, trusting my gut & finally I feel free #yogasavedmylife ” . Meet London yogini Ess @wellness.with_ess These are her words ❤ " At 16 I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, Anxiety & Depression. In 2010 I was admitted into hospital: a risk to myself. My heart had shrunk, my liver failing, covered in bed sores & burns from where my clothes rubbed me & balding I was in hospital for 368 days The Anorexia was fuelled by a lack of self worth, self trust & belonging; comparison & perfectionism. On leaving hospital my medics insisted I try Yoga as I was “banned” from aerobic & gym exercise (over exercising made up a huge part of my Anorexia) . I tried studio yoga for a few months. Hated it. ‘Where’s the sweat? The burn?’ I gave up My eating got obsessive again & some of the work in hospital unravelled.I felt vulnerable again: lost. I rejoined a gym , targeting a #fitspo body. In 2015, injuries led me to a physio, who told me “Ess you’re not made for this high impact stuff. You’re built for yoga” Everything changed I cancelled the gym, ditched the weights. Bought a mat. Immediately I felt free. Calmer. Home . And once I began practicing pranayama & meditation I can honestly say Yoga saved me & continues as a significant aspect of my healing Yoga , beyond the asanas, cultivated the missing piece of recovery: self compassion. I now feel kindness, respect & admiration for my body whether she’s bloated or gained a few pounds I manage my anxiety through Meditation & pranayama; daily gratitude combats my depression. Yoga has unlocked my attachment to achievement & perfection. I can accept that some days I can hold crow pose, others I can’t. It’s not a reflection of me or my soul On my mat I'm content & at home: able to shut out the outside world & the 500 voices I sometimes hear in my head. It’s pure peace. I’m now in YTT. I want to give back, to learn how to teach others how they can save themselves through Yoga Namaste, Ess 🙏❤
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